Me and my 'best friend" Insomia used to have some bonding these days. So I was struggling of what to do so I could get sleepy. Thanks to lovely Adobe Photoshop for always being there. And since I am totally a KryBer deprived and dying to see them in a lesbian movie such as Korean version of Yes or No, I ended up making this fan made movie poster. How I wish this is true. I would definitely die if this happens. 

It took an hour just to fix their t-shirts; erasing the designs so I could put that "yes" and "no" captions like what's Tina and Aom wearing on the original movie poster.  

And spent almost 3 hours to finish this craziness. <: 

To those who aren't aware anyway, Yes or No is Thailand's first ever movie which has a lesbian love story. And that movie is one of my favorite Thai movies. If you're suffering for having an identity crisis because of being a fan of f(x)'s Amber or if you're into lesbians, you would surely enjoy and hook in the movie. 

So, how was the fanart I made? :)


BUT I honestly can’t get enough of Kyungsoo. ♥ T_____T Every time he smiles, every time he looks like “I WAS ABOUT TO CRY” when he can’t answer the questions properly on their radio guesting, every time he sings with confident in front of the camera, when he trolls with the other members, every time he proclaims himself as the “eomma” of the group (sooo cute), every time he perfectly impersonates Oh Gwang-Rok with “Aagh~ Jotda~”, every time he does that lip touching step in MAMA choreography, every time he laughs while hiding his face because of shyness and every time he does this famous “O.o” expression of him, HE SERIOUSLY ATTRACTS ME A LOT AND I ALMOST FORGET MY 2 ULTIMATE EXO BIASES. T__________T  

And I don’t know what got me into this, but I am sometimes perving on him. Ugh. Sorry.  

Happy Birthday Byun Bacon ♥

I used to like Luhan before until I heard you sing “Into Your World” and your voice almost killed me ‘cause you sound like a heaven sent “Angel”. Then from that day forward, you became my ultimate bias in Exo-K together with Kris of Exo-M and I’m not regretting it though you’re trying your very best to make everyone laugh with your lame jokes. :D

Baekhyun babe, thank you so much for existing. Thank you for being soooo perfect in my eyes; your perfect hands, your flawless skin, your perfect eyeliner, your oh-so-killing voice, your smile, your eyes, EVERYTHING is perfection. But in case you show a sudden flaws, I will be willing to accept and love it anyways. ‘Cause I’m eternally in love with you like that. Whuuuuut? Puhahaha. :DDD

I love youuuuu Bacon-ssi. ♥ Please continue inspiring me. ^^

His 8th Years of Existence.

Happy eight years of your precious existence, Kim Kibum!

Yes. Existence.

Perhaps any kpop fan who’s reading this right now might laughing on me and thinks I am crazy for talking about “your existence” and even celebrating it.

Well, I am your fan; your loyal, faithful and dedicated avid fan. Although for some people you doesn’t exist anymore, I never forgot nor releases that name “Kim Kibum” in my head and heart. After you left Super Junior and decided to pursue your acting career, I never stop monitoring you ever since. I mean, I have lots of source of where to get updates about you. As in LOTS OF SOURCE.

Though some people or should I say some ELFs who used to loved you, thought that you are might be dead already, your existence never fade into mine baby.

You are my first love. I know I had tried to replace you with my other biases in Kpop; I am still falling into your gravity. I cannot imagine how life would it be if you did not come in my life. I just could not forget someone like you honey. I have been spending my half-life for years in this most awesome side of the world called KPOP and it is all because of YOU.

Surrendering my loyalty to you for almost five years is not enough, as long as you are breathing, as long as you make me smile, as long as you live your life to its fullest through your very passionate way of acting, I will follow you sir. :)

Even you’re not a part of my favorite group for now; you are still a very special human being to me just like what I felt when I first saw you, five years ago.

I would not get tired of waiting at that day when you finally come back to the group where you belong and would give you too much love for the second time around. I am not the only one who expects for that to happen, billionths of us I guess. But whatever happens, whatever is your final decision baby, we will always be legal. You will always be mine and I am always yours.

Thank you so much for existing Kibum. ♥

Loving you until her last breathe,
Jhaney (Amberfied)

Sorry Grammar Nazis. I’m not a good English student. :)


[FMV] WooGyu 우규 Couple - It's First Love (첫사랑이죠)

I guess my weekends are not complete without having some time with my best bud, Sony Vegas HD Platinum. But I was busy these days so I wasn't able to make FMVs. BUT since I am falling for one of Infinite's Royal Couple, I couldn't help it but to finished my First WooGyu FMV :) Though I'm into YaDong at first, I can say that this one is more real. Sorry for I wasn't able to put lots of WooGyu moments. I just chose among my favorite.

Anyway, big credits to the owners of photos and fancams. Comments are love! Enjoy the video. :) WOOGYU IS LOVEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

BTW, I chose this song again since it's the most romantic song nowadays. 

Music: It's First Love (첫사랑이죠) - IU (아이유) & Na Yoon Kwon (나윤권)

[English Translation]

How is it that we, how is it that now
How is it that the two of us ended up here
Time passes by like the stars inside many people

Inside my heart (My heart)
Filling my eyes (Filling)
Is all of you (You)
Piling up
It seems that without any sound
Even our cold fingertips become warmer

Even if we don't speak
We're filled in each other's eyes
Now when you're sick
I will feel your forehead

Let us not be afraid
It's an exciting first love like honey
Carefully, day by day again
I will always love you

Your face (When I)
That voice (Remember)
When I remember them (You)
My heart becomes flushed
The cold day, frozen in white
Seems to be melting away

Even if we can't see
The hands we gave each other are pretty warm
On the nights that you can't sleep
I will hold onto your hands

We trust each other
It's a first love that twinkles like a star
Even if our hearts are pounding
Step by step again, I will get a little closer

Like the delightful first snow
I want to have my first kiss
With you, who came to me
I can hear your heart
It seems like the two of us
Are the only ones in the world

Even if we don't speak
We're filled in each other's eyes
Now when you're sick
I will feel your forehead

Let us not be afraid
It's an exciting first love like honey
Carefully, day by day again
I will always love you

You're my first love


Been inspired with designers from Deviantart and Tumblr, so I decided to try it with myself. So this is my first trial of making an album cover and movie poster starring our very own KRYBER and F(x) members. Kekekeke. :D Did I do well? 



*Movie credits are only fictional. This is just for entertainment purposes.
*Done via Adobe Photoshop CS2
*All picture credits goes to S.M. Entertainment CO., LTD.

[NEWS] f(x)’s Luna Graduates from High School

With a diploma in one hand and a simple bouquet in the other, f(x)‘s Luna was all smiles at her high school graduation ceremony on February 7th.

The idol attended the ceremony at Seoul Lila Arts High School in her school uniform, completing the look of a young student with her cute pigtails.

Luna told Star News, “After the graduation ceremony, I’m going to chat a lot with my friends. I’m sad to say goodbye to them.” She continued, “It’s a new beginning, so I am going to work hard in everything I do from now on.”

In March, Luna will attend her first college class at JoongAng University, where she was accepted as a theater major.

Unfortunately, her classmate Jiyeon from girl group T-ara could not attend the ceremony because of her busy schedule with ‘Dream High 2′.

Congratulations to both ladies on their milestone achievement!

Source: Star News via Naver


Yaaaaah! So proud of my baby Luna :) Although she is busy with her career in showbiz industry, she still prioritized to study hard and finally graduated from high school. ^^ I really admire this kiddo from being industrious and hardworking as well. Anyway, best luck on your collage Sunyoung-ssi!

[BLOG] The Best Sexy Thing Ever ♥

Amber's Me2day update :) ♥

낼도 봐요~ ming tian ye jian! 근데 뒤에 ”남자3호love“라고 써있음ㅋㅋ

Translation: See you again tomorrow~ (Korean) See you again tomorrow! (Chinese)
By the way, it was written "No.3 Guy love" at the back keke

PS: No.3 Guy referring to Super Junior Donghae
A fan wrote "No.3 Guy love" at the back of the board

Credits: Amber's me2day
Korean to English translations: KBNye |


Yeah baby! You don't have an idea how goddamn smexxxxxy and hoooot you are. <3 Can't stop giggling every time I see this picture. Your eyes is just sooooo ugh... okay, FOREVER SEXY. ♥

[BLOG] When the Princess and The Servant Sleeps Together

Last Wednesday (February 1, 2012), Krystal updated her Me2Day with this hilarious photo with Amber and Sulli ♥

“연말 시상식무대 연습하다 지쳐 쓰러진 우리들…ㅎㅎ”

But since I'm KryBer deprive for almost a month, the thoughts had just played my mind again and pushed to make a fan art. 

GOAL FOR THE KRYBER FAN ART: Make Krystal and Amber sleeps like they were really together. 


I just failed on doing it. :) I couldn't make it perfectly but I worked hard on it. So this was the fail result :)

Sorry T_________________T

[BLOG] The Incomparable Excitement for Yes or No Part 2 ♥

This is it.

I've been waiting for this for a long time. Finally, the lovely Aom and adorable Tina just confirmed it. YES OR NO PART 2!!!!! They had just started to film on the first week of January. And approximately, it will be release on early July. I can't wait for this. :) I fell in love with this couple since the first part of this movie. And would surely falling for them more on its sequel. If I were to ask, I want to have a more sweetness AOMTINA moments in part 2. Not having any third parties or whatever. I just don't want any circumstance will interrupt their relationship. Hahaha. :D I know it will turn out boring without any conflict on the story, but that's my own opinion anyway.

I love this movie so much. They just showed that nothing is forbidden when it comes to love. As long as you love and trust each other, forbidden love or not, SHOULD ALWAYS ANSWER YES! NOT NO. :)

Here's the trailer of Yes or No Part 1. Promise! This is a must watch movie. ♥



Yaaaaaah! It's your 26th year yet you're still beautiful and prettier. :) Thanks for taking care the F(x) babies. Wishing you more powers and good health! Good luck on your first drama series. :) We will always be here to support and follow your group until our last breath. WE LOVE YOU VIC EOMMA!!!!


[NEWS] f(x)’s Luna’s Crying Act Moves Many Viewers’ Hearts

F(x)’s Luna got recognized as a talented actress with her crying act.

On TV Chosun’s ‘Saving Mrs.Go Bong Sil’ that aired on January 21, Luna who plays the role of Go Bong Sil (played by Kim Hae Sook)’s youngest daughter Seo In Young (played by Luna) showed off her acting skills like that of a professional.

In this broadcast, the youngest daughter In Young finds out that Go Bong Sil went up to Itaewon in secret and is living a new life there. In Young meets up with her mom, and cries in her mother’s arms all sad and upset about her leaving the family.

After the broadcast, viewers responded: “You cry way better than I thought.” “You almost made me cry.” “You’re so good at acting.” “A new crying-idol?”

Even before the shooting, Luna went into character to act for that particular crying scene. Actress Kim Hae Sook who looks after Luna as if she were her child, advised her and practiced beforehand to help her.


Waaaaah! So proud of my baby! <3 I knew ever since that she can be a good actress someday. :)
Source/Credits: TV REPORT
Translations: GATEWAY2KOREA@twitter

[NEWS] INFINITE helps clean the stadium after ‘Idol Star Athletics Championships’

Idol group INFINITE has undoubtedly reached the upper heights of fame, but despite that, they’ve demonstrated that they’re still humble at heart.

A fancam from MBC‘s recent recording of the ‘Idol Star Athletics & Swimming Championships‘ revealed footage of INFINITE staying behind to help clean up the stadium. Though there were plenty of crew members to clear the floor, the boys decided to lend a hand anyway.

Both fans and netizens were highly impressed by INFINITE’s gentlemanly manners as well as their sincere desire to please fans. It’s easy to see why INFINITE has quickly become one of the most respected idol groups in the industry.

In related news, the ‘Idol Star Athletics and Swimming Championships’ will air as an MBC Lunar New Year’s special later on this month.


Gaaah! That's why I guessed its just a good choice to have them as my new fandom. Such a niceeee guys though I know in reality they didn't want to clean stuffs but still have chosen to help in the end. Proud newbie Inspirit here. LOL. :)

Original Post at:


Ever since this group's hot debut, NEVER they had failed to amaze me with their extraordinary God given talents. Being versatile is which I can say has been made them incomparable from other KPOP artists of their generation.

As I followed their way to the start of success, I've witnessed how hard working these young people even at very young age.

Last January 12 of the present year, Golden Disk Award was held. And out of tons KPOP groups in the industry, F(x) was one of the 6 chosen who had received its prestigious award called Bonsang Award. All the hard work has already attained a good outcome. It's their first time to win this kind of award and they totally deserve it. :)

It's just the start of their steps to success and I believe that these very hard working kiddos would someday be a highly honored idol. And as they conquer their way to the highest point of victory, I promise to follow them unstoppable until they take their last breath. :)

I'll be forever a pure F(x) fan. Promise. <,:

[OFFICIAL] 120121 Amber w/ Her sister Shopping at Human Potential

YAAAAH!!!! So handsAMBER. <3 And I like her sister's tan skin color. :) So cuteeeeeee ^^

Re-upload: Chinjane |

[SELCA] 120121 Krystal's Me2day Update!

Everybody chu~♥ 새해 복 많이 받으세요^^

Finally!!!! F(5)! GAWD. I'm so happy when I saw this. Cute DorKRYBER is <3. :))))) No LUNTORIA but still... I just wanted to die right nowwwwwww!

Credit: krystal@me2day
Re-upload:Chinjane |

[FIC] You're Mine and No One Else Does (One-shot)

Author: Amberfied
Pairing: KryBer
Rating and length: PG, One-Shot


“Knock—knock! Krys?”

“Amber, it’s our room. No need to knock on your own door since you already know it’s open.” I shouted from the top of my lungs so she can surely hear it.

I saw her passed by the door but I ignored it instead. I was really upset. And she has no idea how upset am I tonight.

“Hi baby! I missed you. How’s today filming?” She climbed on the bed and put her arms on my shoulder. I irritably moved my shoulder to release her hand. I turned back my focus in front of my laptop and continued browsing the net.

“Why Krys? Are… you mad baby?”

“Don’t call me baby! As if I’m your’s!” I quickly got up from bed and moved to the kitchen to prepare for dinner. I could hear her footsteps hastily following me downstairs.

“Krys? What’s with you? I don’t understand. We’re even okay when I left this morning. What’s happening?”

“You’re asking me what’s happening. Why don’t you try asking YOUR DONGHAE or YOUR HENRY if what’s actually happening.”

“What? What do you mea—?”

And then there was silence. She suddenly stopped from talking meaning she finally figure out what I am saying.

“Don’t tell me it’s about Donghae hyung’s tweet?”

“YES! It’s all about HIS AMBER and YOUR DONGHAE’S tweet. Now I’m asking you, what’s actually happening?!” She took a deep breathe and slowly walked towards me.

“Krys… that tweet is just nothing. Why worrying about it?” She mumbled as she held my both hands. But I released it.

“So when you’re actually smiling in that two photos with YOUR DONGHAE, means nothing to you? Well, it means a lot to me. I knew it; I should have followed you there at Osaka so I could have seen your behavior. But since I have the naughtiest girlfriend ever, she has replaced me that instantly.” I crossed my arms and frowned.

“What are you saying? Krystal, let me know you this, Donghae oppa called me “MY AMBER” because he treats me like her sister. You know that fans called us Dino family together with Jonghyun oppa. You are aware of that. Aren’t you? We’re just trying to have fun that time.”

“Yeah right. Trying to have fun while I’m not around.”

“Krys… trying to have fun is different from being contented. The reason why we’re trying to have fun because he actually saw me alone and lonely while sitting at the corner after the concert. Then he just confronted me and I told him, as usual, I am sad, frustrated, unsatisfied, discontented or what ever negative vibe I could ever feel that time. Then since he has been a brother to me and I have been a little sister to her as well, he just comforted me through that funny selcas. And please Krys! Don’t think that I would replace you. Because I would definitely not. I always tell you that.” She grabbed my hands again. At this time I didn’t protest after hearing her explanation. But there’s still one thing that bothers me.

“…and what about Henry oppa’s tweet? Why did he tell Donghae oppa that… you’re his’?” I pouted.

“Soojung-ah… You know that Henry is one of my closest friends in our agency. I’m sure he’s just joking when he tweeted that. Yaaaaaah! Stop being jealous! You know that I like it when you’re jealous but I don’t actually like when seeing you upset and frustrated.”

“Really? I—I’m sorry then. I’m sorry for being a possessive girlfriend. You know that you’re the only one I want. I should have asked you first before getting mad.”

“Naaaah!” She scratched my head.” If you’re possessive, then what more I can call myself of being more possessive when it comes to you? I understand why you felt that way. Good thing you well-behaved when that Jae Suk confessed that you’re the woman of her interest. When I first heard that from Sulli, I even started to fix my things and wanted to fly back to Korea immediately even the concert has not starting yet, if it’s not just with Vic eomma who stopped me. I wanted to tell that guy that no one is allowed to have an interest on you except her handsome girlfriend. You’re mine baby!”

“You’re mine too and no one else does!” I muttered as I pinched her nose.

Finally, I am completely relieved. Aisssh! Why so stupid Krystal? You always let your jealousy comes out first. So shameful. From now on, I should embed into my mind that I have the most honest girlfriend in the world. I’m way too lucky to have her in my life.

I pecked a kiss on her lips and gave her a tight hug. Oh yeah! I missed her scent. I fell contented that she’s with me now. I should have felt no worries anymore.

I released my body from hugging her and gave her a smile. But her face suddenly turned into confused state.

“By the way… How were you able to know about Donghae oppa’s tweet? You don’t even have a tweeter account?”

“Ah… Uhm… I forgot that website but it goes like… Kry… kryber… kryberpalace? Kryberpalace? I’m not sure but I think it sounds like that way. I think it’s one of the international forums dedicated for the both of us.”

“Ah yeah… Kryberpalace. That’s where I actually enjoy reading some fan fictions about us…” she murmured looking at the ceiling.

“What? What did you say?”

“Ugh… nothing. I said… I’m starving. Let’s eat.”


 *KryBerPalace: (International Site for KryBer)

[FIC] The Runaway Bride (One-shot)

Author: Amberfied
Pairing: KryBer
Rating: PG, One-shot


This day has arrived and I am sure she has been dreaming of this too.

She is wearing that simple but elegant white long gown. It fits her perfectly that made her the sexiest bride in the entire world. Her hair is tied with a shining crochet pinned within. She just wore the simplest make-up but still her instinctive gorgeousness stunned around the whole sacred place. She is the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen in my entire life and how she dressed up today made her more beautiful from being the most. Yeah. I admire her that way. Sounds exaggerating but that is the truth. I am not the only one who finds her the same way I do. BUT the only thing which I could say that made me different with any other guy around Krystal’s life is I am a girl. And this girl is the only person who she dared to love. That bride I was talking about is Krystal and she is my girlfriend.

BUT unfortunately she is not going to marry me.

We both own the same gender and getting married is prohibited. We have been in a relationship for almost five years until her parents were able to found out what is going on between us. They took Krystal away from me. Went back to States for good. Her mother threatened me that if I ever intended to follow Krystal, she will ask someone to kill me. I was not able to do anything or fight for the love we had for the long time. I was weak like that and even let her stay away from me.

And now this is the worst consequence of all.

After couple of years we have been far away from each other; did not have any communication not even once for around three years. And just when I thought I’m strong enough to for our love, I followed her in States but didn’t ever expect that our next meet up is going to be on her wedding. Getting married with another guy and it broke me into pieces. How I wish whenever I close my eyes, I would just die right away. But when I noticed her while marching that red aisle, the sorrow in her face didn’t outshined by any glamorous make-up nor beautiful wedding dress or that elegant bouquet of flowers in her hands.

There’s something wrong in her. I know. For the long time I have known her, I can differentiate if when she’s sad or when she’s happy. And today, she’s no just sad, she’s miserable. I could feel that she doesn’t like what is actually happening. I saw her tears gently running on her face. People inside would think that those tears were sign of happiness, but I could assure that it’s not. My tears suddenly feel down when she finally reached the altar with her groom. Not just hour and they are going to be husband and wife. My chest wanted to burst out. If only I could cry out loud and called her name from afar and say…

“Krys! You haven’t change a bit since you left me. You’re still that stupid girl I loved. Don’t know how to refuse someone’s command. Even if it hurts you a lot. Even if it turns you to misery for your entire life. I’m finally here. Please be strong and decide for your life for the last minute. Decide for us Krystal.”

My tears keep on falling because I couldn’t do anything. It’s a sacred ceremony and I couldn’t do anything to stop this bullshit.

“Woman, do you accept this man to be your lawful husband for richer and for poorer?”

The priest’s words were the question I’m frightened to hear. Here it goes. Her groom already accepted her to be her wife and only her answer would mark everything and would might ended everything we’ve been through. I wiped my tears and turned back as I decided to just walk out from the place. I didn’t even realize that it took her so long before breaking up her answer.

“… I’m sorry!—“I heard that very familiar sob which made me stopped from walking. “I’m really sorry. I can’t accept him!” I quickly turned my body and look after her. Her answer made everyone panicked except me. I was indeed shocked but it turned my tears into happiness from being upset. I saw her running quickly on the aisle while shredding tears. Choosing the best for her life. I knew it. Our strong relationship had conquered everything. I run outside the church following where she’s going.

She stopped from running and hides her face by her hands. She’s still sobbing. I softly walk towards her making sure she wouldn’t notice me. As I finally reached her. I released her hands that cover her face and suddenly hugged her. She stopped from crying and probably shocked of what I’ve just done.

“Don’t cry baby. I’m here.” I whispered as I scratched her messy hair.

“Am… Amber?” Her sweet voice smashed into my ears again. Without looking on me, she realized that I am really her Amber. She continued from crying and gave me a tight hugged back. Her crying sounds different with when he said “NO” to her groom awhile ago.She’s crying now with happiness.

“Thank you for choosing me Krystal. You have no idea how much you made me happy.”

“Sorry Amber if I left you. I promise not to stay away from you anymore.”

“Shhhh!” I touched her soft lips and stopped her from mouthing any words. I gave her the passionate kiss we used to share for years and we will continue to share this for the rest of our lives.


[FIC] Forbidden Love (One-Shot)

Title: Forbidden Love
Author: Amberfied
Pairing: KryBer
Rating and length: PG, One-Shot


[Amber’s POV]

It’s almost 11 in the evening now and the concert had just ended. After waving our goodbyes to the fans, I hastily ran heading to the dressing room. I even over heard Sulli called my name to wait for them, but I purposely ignored it. I have been impatiently wanted to finish the concert immediately just for this moment to arrive. As I stepped inside the dressing room, I quickly grabbed my phone and eagerly unlocked its keypad. And as I checked my inbox for some SMS, I’ve been frustrated all of a sudden.

She didn’t texted me. Not at least once for this day. I am already worrying about her. As I keep on back reading her previous messages in my inbox, I heard the door screeches as it opens. It was Sulli, Luna and Victoria eomma.

“I knew it. Did she reply already?” Sulli mouthed as she grabbed a piece of tissue on the table and wipes her sweat all over her face. “Not yet.” I pouted as I leaned my back on the chair. I stare at the ceiling, thinking if what she has been doing lately that she didn’t even bother herself to text me since this morning. I bend forward and hurriedly dialed her number to make a call.

Her line is unattended.

I dialed and dialed and dialed her number a couple of times but still I always got the same response. “Soojung-ah! Please don’t make this hard for me.” I whispered frustratingly.

“Amber… Krystal is still probably filming for her scene. Please be patient. She will surely call you back when she is free.” Victoria eomma interfered. “But she didn’t even texted since this morning. Did she film for her scene the whole day? I don’t think so. Ugh~” I insisted.

“Yaaaah! I know you misses Krystal so bad. We also do Amber. But we should understand that she’s much committed on her own activity. The both of you have done talking about this. Haven’t you?” Her she goes again. The loquacious Luna has already intruded.

“But I have been missing her a lot. If I would to choose, I am not going here with you guys instead visits her on that disgusting sitcom’s filming.”

“I am actually feeling the same way you are. I miss your appa. I can’t wait for tomorrow. I just want to go back to South Korea right now.” Victoria eomma mumbled as she changed her high heels to slippers. “Ugh~ my feet aches. It almost became paralyzed while we were performing.


After our performance for our Comeback Stage at Music Bank:

“Ugh. My feet~ the dance floor was so slippery and I had to control my feet against falling.” She cutely pouted as she kept on massaging her feet. I suddenly removed her hands and grabbed her feet. I gave her the “let me take care of this” smile and gently massaged her food. Giving my very best to release all the pain that’s giving her a hard time.

“Don’t worry my princess. As long as your devoted servant is here, you certainly wouldn’t feel any kind of torturing body aches. I can handle anything just for you”.

“Nah. Amber, you’re not my servant. You’re my girlfriend. You don’t have to do this. I can manage it by myself.” She gave me that oh-so-weakening smile and removed her foot from my hands. But I opposed. “Girlfriend or Servant, still the same. If only people know how precious Jung Soojung is and how important her feet not any single vain to get emboss, they would probably do the same thing I am doing.” I forcedly grabbed her foot again and continuously massage it. It was just so damn flawless. I couldn’t help but to admire how she take good care of her feet. My privilege since I have feet fetish when it comes to women.

“Fine. So much with those exaggerating words. I will let you do this just for once. And next time, don’t act like you are more my servant than being my girlfriend. I really don’t like it.”


“No buts. Or I shall break up with you.” I was dropped jaw after hearing her threat. “Wha—what… do you mean?” I uttered nervously.

“Ha-ha-ha. Just kidding baby!” She pecked a kiss on my chick trying to release my tension. Then she stared at me. I was relief. “You know I can’t do that. I can’t afford to loose you.”

“Me either Krystal.”

*end of flashback*

I shook my head and went back to reality. Ugh. I suddenly missed those times. When will we be as sweet again as before? I miss my baby so much.

“Excuse me! PD-nim wants to talk to F(x) outside. Hurry!” The stage manager eagerly informed us inside the dressing room. And I hate it. This might be an after concert meeting again. It will surely take hours until it ends.

I took a deep sighed as I slothfully stood up from sitting. I checked my phone again and still on its same state. My group mates hurriedly run outside except me. I’m just naturally lazy for these stuffs when my girlfriend is not around. Everything I do and I will do seems meaningless.


[Krystal’s POV]

“Cut! Good take! That’s all for today. Sugohaseutseumnida!”

“Nae. Sugohaseutseumnida!” I bowed to the director and my co-actor and hurriedly run to check my phone. Ugh crap! I didn’t notice that my phone’s battery was already exhausted. This can’t be happen. She might have sent text messages on me. I need to give response as soon as possible. I kept digging my bag to look where my phone charger is. ANOTHER crappy thing, I forgot it on our dorm.

“Omo. Ottoke?” I lip bit and brush some strands of my hair.

“You okay?” my co-actor Jong Suk oppa worriedly muttered.

“Huh? Nae. It’s just… my phone’s battery had been emptied already.” I pouted as I continued looking for my charger. Making sure if it’s really nowhere to be found among my things. “And I forgot to bring my—“

“Here. Use this.” He handled me his phone charger and I finally feel relieved.

“Neomu kamsahamnida oppa!” I bowed on him like there’s no tomorrow. I quickly plugged the charger on my phone and bingo! It finally turned on.

24 messages received.

4 came from Vic eomma. 6 came from Jessica eonnie. Two of them came from Luna eonnie and Sulli eonnie and the rest came from my girlfriend. Longing for her presence, I even ignored the previous SMS when I saw her messages.

[Good morning baby! Didn’t catch you when you woke up this morning. Seems that I won’t have any energy for today’s concert. Why left so early? Anyway… good luck for today’s filming. I know you’ll do well. As always. ^___^ See you soon. I will always love you Krys!

Your devoted servant,


[Krys! How’s everything there? Did you start filming? The concert is about to start in an hour. Wish you were here. I love you baby. <3


[We’re done Krys! How’s my baby? Didn’t have any message from you since this morning. I’m worried now. Please let me know what you’re doing now. I love you Krys! ^^

Loving you to its fullest,


[Krys! I’m worried now. You there? T___T]

[Krys!!!!!!!!! T____________T]

Damn! My chest wanted to burst out after reading her messages. These worries are those things I’m avoiding her to feel. I don’t want her to feel lonely when I’m not around. Every time she’s telling me that she misses me, I just suddenly wanted to walk out even though we’re still having this filming shiz. If it’s not with our agency’s CEO, I wouldn’t have done this. Knowing that this would lessen the time I’m supposed to be with my group’s side. With my girlfriend’s side.

Why it has always to be like this. Why do I always give her nothing but worries? Being her girlfriend. I should always stay by her side. Though our love is forbidden, I don’t fucking care. If our relationship would become the reason for an end this career, I’m willing to take the risk of it and I’m sure she would do the same thing. I can loose anything I have but one thing is for sure, I couldn’t afford to loose someone like her. Someone like Amber.

And now, I’m already tired of this. I must stop this stupidity as early as possible. I finally decided. And when I decide, no one could ever interfere nor stop me. Especially when the decision has something to do with our relationship. I don’t care if I might loose anything after I do this, EVERYTHING IN MY LIFE IS AMBER so I have left with no choice.

I quickly fixed my things and run towards where the whole cast were currently gathering. I took a deep breathe before mouthing any words.

“Excuse me! I—have... something to tell everyone…”


“Hello? Krys?”


“Thank God you called. Where are you? I was worried about you the whole day. Wait why is your voi—are you crying?”

“Amber… I’m really sorry…”

“What? Why saying sorry? Hey—so you’re really crying? Krys! Please let me know where you are. I’ll look for you!”

“Baby… I already quit.”

“Quit what? I don’t understand!”

“Filming for High Kick 3.”

“HUH? But why? Why did you quit? You should have not done that.”

“If I don’t quit, then how about us? After reading your messages, I couldn’t help it anymore. I hate myself. Being with that stuff seems that I’m always giving you a hard time. And it feels like I’m not happy of doing this anymore. First, I’m always far away from you. Second, I always keep on missing you. We didn’t even catch ourselves awake. Every time I got home, you were already peacefully sleeping and when you‘re the one who is leaving, I was the one who who’s asleep. I’m getting tired of this scheme. I want these things to stopped and well continue our relationship instead. I don’t like the feeling that we’re both longing for each other. We should always stay in each other’s side right?”

“Krys… but… What about your director and co-actors? Lee Sooman sonsaengnim? What would they think about you after doing this? I’m just concern of you baby.”

“I don’t care if what would they think or say about me. Amber… I can afford to loose everything in my life but not you. NOT YOU AMBER!”

“Me as well Krys! I love you 100 million times you do. Well, if that’s your decision… I will always stay at your side. Don’t worry I’ll help you with everything. Now, it’s my turn, tell me where you are so I can fetch you right away.”

“I’m just right here.”

“Where? Tell me where exactly that is?”

“Behind you…”

“What do you mean---“

I whispered to her ear to make her understand what I mean. She suddenly turned and faced me. I saw the relief on her face when she finally saw me standing in front of her. She gave me a warm tight hug until I couldn’t even move. After 2 months of filming for HK3, we have seen each other again. BOTH AWAKE AND ALIVE. She was really happy seeing me again but I could say I was probably happier than her. Because, I am sure that choosing her and choosing our relationship from my unsure career, was the best decision I made for my entire life.

When she finally releases me from her very warmth embrace that no one could ever give me except her, she stares straight on my eyes, giving me those precious smiles; she fixed some strands of my hair that messing around my face. She caresses my chicks with her hand which feels even softer than mine.

“Krystal, Thank you for giving up everything just for our relationship. Thank you for daring to love me.”

“Amber… Ever since I started to breathe, you were the best THING that happened in my life. And I would love to love that THING until I finish breathing and just to let you know, loving you Amber is not just a dare, it’s a chose. A chose I would never ever regret for the rest of my life.”

She gave me that passionate kiss ever. That kiss was the best of all. It comprises the warmth of love we have for each other. All the strength that we’ve been exerted for this what they called forbidden love. Forbidden or not, All I know is, we will keep this relationship stronger and promise to stay in each others side until our hair became dyed by white.

“I love you Krystal…”

“I love you Amber…”